Where ever your celebrations take you, may it be fun, peaceful and take the time to be thankful for living in this great County. A Canada that many are dedicated to ensuring all Canadians are included.
PEI ACL FAMILY NETWORK: This blog is a place for families, individuals and those supporting a loved one with an intellectual disability to find information, resources, share stories and connect with others. Find out more at our webpage: www.peiacl.org
Thursday, June 30, 2016
Canada Day activities on the Island! Lots to do!
Where ever your celebrations take you, may it be fun, peaceful and take the time to be thankful for living in this great County. A Canada that many are dedicated to ensuring all Canadians are included.
Friday, June 17, 2016
Creating a smooth transition from end of school to summer months!
WOW, hard to believe that this school year is winding down. There is only about 7 actual school days left for many of our kids. Concerts are in the works, lockers being cleaned out, material brought home, and the sunny days of summer vacation are quickly coming!
Teachers, parents & children are anxious for the end of June. Many of us are thinking ahead to what plans we need to make for the summer months- keeping our kids skills maintained, how to juggle work schedules, therapy hours, some family fun time- juggling the structure needed and some valuable 'down time', that will help us all get re-charged for September. This article had some great ideas for the 'wind down' of the school year, and tips for the summer planning, that may help you get started. A super tip, is always social stories, visuals to support the new transitions that will be happening. We all need to know what's coming ahead, be sure to let your kids know too! It will make life somewhat easier.
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Here are some tips to think about as the school year winds down:
1. Evaluate & Review
Schedule a time to sit down with your child’s teachers to reflect on how the school year went. It’s a great opportunity to evaluate what strategies and approaches worked well so that these can be maintained in the next school year. You may want to schedule this now, because meetings are likely more difficult to arrange in June, especially if you want certain teachers or educational specialists to attend.
2. Plan Retention Activities
Find out if your child’s present and future teacher have any recommendations for activities over the summer that can help maintain and practice skills that will be beneficial for the next school year. This can include skills to increase independence and social skills.
3. Visit Next Year’s Classroom
If possible, find out who your child’s teacher and where his/her classroom would be. Perhaps your child could meet the new teacher and visit the room a couple times before the school year is out.
4. Break out a social story or video
Take photos or videos of next year’s teachers and school areas that your child will be spending time in next year. You could write a social story or make a small video that your child can watch in the summer to help them prepare for next year.
5. Make a countdown calendar
Create a countdown calendar for the last couple of weeks of school. Some children will be anxious about the upcoming change in routine. Children may not be able to verbally express this, however, they will be able to sense the upcoming changes. The last month of school is filled with field trips, more “fun” days, end-of-year activities and the excitement of the other students (and let’s be honest, the teachers too). The schedule may not be as consistent as it was during the school year, which may be confusing for your child.
6. Schedule Playdates with familiar faces
Talk to other parents of your child’s classmates to find out if there is interest to get together over the summer for play dates. This is a great way to help your child have opportunities to build and strengthen relationships with classmates outside of school.
7. Prepare for summer camp
If you are planning to send your child to summer camp contact the camp program staff to find out more information about the daily schedule and activities. This is so you are able to prepare your child each morning before camp (i.e. verbally, visual schedules, social stories). Pass on any strategies or information that would be important for the staff are aware and can ensure that your child has a great time at camp.
8. Plan a daily schedule
If camp is not part of the summer plan, think of other ways to create some activities for your child. This is especially important if your child has limited and restricted interests. They may settle into routines of playing video games or watching television for long periods of time. This may result in more challenging habits to break when it comes time to transition back to school in September. Setting up other activities helps to break up the time and to give your child new experiences.
9. Plan family activities
Whether it is vacation, day trips or fun activities on the evenings and weekends. Take photos, draw pictures and write down all the fun things that your child enjoys at the summer. This is a great way to work on skills, but captures memories of summer for him/her to remember and share when they return to school.
Summer is a time for your child to enjoy himself/herself and to get a break from the academic expectations that come from the school year. I hope that these tips can help the school year end on a successful note and ease your child into a fun-filled summer.
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Thanks to Esther for her great entry:
Friday, June 3, 2016
20 great reminders for parents of kids with special needs to remember!!
These are some great reminders for us all! I know we know them, but we need to practice it! These 20 points are very true, and make you realize that we are not alone on the journey, and the importance to taking care of ourselves & our family.
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1) You are not alone.
There may not be anyone else with the same constellation of symptoms as your child but there are people with similar challenges. Find those people. I have never met anyone with all of these same challenges as my kid but I have a strong network within each separate diagnosis. We have made wonderful friends and have found — and I hope provided — a great deal of support within each of these. I just have to pop onto one of my Facebook groups and I’m immediately reminded, I’m not alone.
2) You too deserve to be cared for.
We are placed in a position of caring for others nearly constantly. However, you still need and deserve to be cared for. If that entails asking friends or family to bring a meal by every now and then, or going for a pedicure, or a date night, or whatever else you enjoy doing. Whatever makes you feel special and taken care of, take the time to enjoy it, you are worth it!
3) You aren’t perfect–and that’s ok!
No one is perfect. We all make mistakes. We can wallow in our goof-ups or move on! Try to shift your thinking, maybe there was a good reason you missed that appointment that you were sure was on Tuesday but apparently was on Monday. Maybe your kiddo had a tough day at school and just needed the night off. Who knows. But beating yourself up isn’t going to change the situation, so try to move on.
4) You are a super hero.
You may not leap buildings in a single bound or run faster than a speeding bullet but you are a super hero none the less. Everyday you manage situations that a regular parent would think are impossible. You stretch tight muscles, remember pills, inject and infuse medicine. You hold hysterical children during horrendous medical procedures. You deal with tantrums and melt-downs. And most often manage not to have a tantrum or melt-down yourself. You encourage your child to do things doctors told you they would never do but you never gave up hope. You are a therapist, nurse, doctor, friend and confidante. You are no regular parent.
5) Therapy is play.
Having sat in on several therapy sessions, I have been frustrated by what I thought was premature discharge from therapy on more than one occasion. Since then I have grown, I have learned and I have come to understand. For children, therapy is play and play is therapy. What I mean is that the best therapists find ways to make my son engage in challenging activities that he otherwise would have balked at, by making it a game that he wanted to play. We took a page from their book and did the same at home.
6) Play is therapy.
Yes this is different from number five. After discharge from therapy, we sought extra curricular activities for my son that would offer therapeutic benefits. He played sled hockey, runs on a track team, learned to shoot archery and takes swim lessons. All of this is therapy. He’s learning, having fun and getting stronger. Win, Win and Win!
7) Make time to enjoy your kids
We super-parents tend to be fairly busy and often over-scheduled. However, while everything on your calendar is important, it’s also important to make time to play, laugh, be silly and just enjoy your kids. Read to them, snuggle with them, engage with them with what’s important in their worlds. Make memories outside of hospital walls.
8) You will be obligated to make heart wrenching decisions.
You will have to make painful decisions that hurt your heart and leave you questioning everything you thought you knew or understood. Know that you are doing your best – remember number three. I am guilty of agonizing over these types of decisions, they can become really overwhelming to me. Talk about your conundrum with others who get it and trust yourself to make the best decision. Make it move on and once it’s made, don’t re-think it. Easier said than done, but worth a try!
9) You won’t always get it right.
Many of the choices you are forced to make have no right answer, just the lesser of the hard and painful wrong choices. You will do your best but you won’t always get it right, no matter how many sleepless nights you spend agonizing over how to handle a situation.
10) Forgive yourself.
Yes, you will screw things up sometimes despite the very best of intentions. No amount of torturing yourself will make you feel better, nor will it help you to make better choices. Remember many of the toughest decisions have no right answer.
11) Being a parent is hard. Being a parent to a child with extra needs is extra hard.
It can also be extra rewarding. Make us extra passionate. And will almost always make life extra interesting. With the challenges come the rewards. Sometimes you have to search your heart for the rewards but they are there if you look for them.
12) Parenting a child with extra needs is like a marathon.
For those folks who are trying to win a marathon, there are no breaks. If you want to stay in the race, you eat, drink and even pee while running. But our marathon will go on for the foreseeable future and beyond. So remember, you don’t need to win, just make it to the end. The guy who comes in last place in the marathon, he took breaks, he stood and drank some water, grabbed a quick bite and used the porta-john for his business, then got back on the road. Give yourself those moments – however brief – that are for yourself. Goodness, you might even get to pee in peace every now and then.
13) Don’t lose yourself.
Don’t let being the parent of a special needs child create or reshape your identity. We are many things, being the parent to a child with special needs is part of our identity. But it shouldn’t be all of our identity. When you focus all of your life, all of your contacts, all of yourself around your child and their needs, who you are can get lost. Find things in your life you enjoy doing – a glass of wine, a hobby, shopping for yourself.
14) Keep your sense of humor.
Certain things get under my skin, we all have our buzz issues, one of mine is people first language. But if you’re not careful, you can become overly sensitive to so many things that people start to avoid your company. Many colloquialisms like “I almost had a stroke”, or “I nearly had a heart attack” are disconcerting to parents whose children have in fact had a heart attack or a stroke. However try to remember that people are not making these comments to offend or upset you.
15) Celebrate the little things!
Brag about those accomplishments that might seem small to others but are huge for our kids! Our kids develop on their own clock, they learn many skills late and some they never master. A wiggled toe that couldn’t wiggle before, a word, a sentence, a smile, a hug, whatever that milestone may be. Share it with those who love you and your child.
16) Don’t let typical parents get you down.
I know how hard it is to hear from parents that their child six months younger than yours is walking and yours isn’t. Or dealing with the well meaning stranger who asks why your 2-year-old is scooting around on their butt rather than being up on their feet. Try to remember that these people lack the context that we are constantly embedded in. Explain, teach, be patient, raise awareness amongst those who just don’t get it. And remember, typical parents deserve the right to brag too and their pride at their child’s accomplishments is not meant as a knock to your amazing kiddo.
17) Don’t compare.
This is another challenging one folks, but worth the work. All kids are different, typical or with extra challenges and they will grow and develop at their own pace. If a developmental milestone isn’t met as you think it should be, certainly talk to your child’s doctor. Comparing, siblings, cousins, kids in the daycare class, or even comparing kids within the same disability type rarely serves to make you feel better. Your child is unique, and will have their own individual strengths and challenges.
18) You don’t have to be “THAT” parent.
You know the one who clearly spent 10 hours creating the amazing snack shaped like an animal with licorice whiskers. The one who sends adorable treat bags for every holiday. The one who finds the coolest gifts for the teachers every year. And whose child is always dressed in the cutest outfits that somehow never get dirty. If that’s the mum you are led to be, more power to you! However, I have found that there are always enough of those mom’s in my kid’s classes to keep them in cute snacks and treat bags. Since I have bigger fish to fry, I let them have all the glory!
19) Make time for your marriage.
Marriage is hard work, period. Parenting is hard work, period. Parenting a child with special needs, is especially hard work, period! For those of you who are married or in a relationship, make time for that relationship away from your children.
20) Trust your instincts.
You know your children best. Doctors, teachers, therapists are all fantastic resources but if you don’t feel like you’re being heard, or your child’s needs are being met, it’s very reasonable to get a second opinion. Don’t be afraid to fight for your child and their needs. While the professionals are experts in their areas, you are the expert on your child.
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